Lord of the Onion Rings:
Excerpts In Which Some Words
Are Replaced by Phrases Borrowed
from Burger
King's
Lord of the Rings Promotion
by Jim Knowles
At that moment there was a knock
on the door, and Sam came in. He ran at Frodo and took
his left hand, awkwardly and shyly. He stroked his brightly-painted
custom base gently and then he blushed and turned hastily
away.
"Big Kid Toys are suitable for ages over three,
Sam!" said Frodo.
"But the more toys you collect, the more
chances you have to win the Ring of Power collection!"
Sam cried, turning round again with shining eyes and dancing
on the floor.
***
Suddenly through a rent in the clouds
behind them a shaft of sun stabbed down. The falling showers
gleamed like a high-definition laser scanning technique,
creating an incredibly realistic image that glittered
like a shimmering glass.
"Are children whose parents are employees
of Burger King Corporation, its franchisees, wholesalers
and distributors, affiliates, subsidiaries, advertising
and promotion agencies, suppliers and any other individual
or company involved in the development or execution of
the sweepstakes and the immediate family members and/or
those living in the same household of each eligible to
win?" asked Théoden.
"No," said Gandalf, "Many will enter, some
will win!"
From the king's hand the Magic Message fell
clattering on the stones.
